First day of school

2010-2011 has begun. I totally did not feel ready going into today. I don't feel like I had enough time to set up my classroom before they showed up at 1st period. By 3rd period prep, my throat was already sore. My classes are larger this year, but I really can't complain because QEIA allows us to still max out at 25:1. My lower back is sore because I sat on my stool to save my feet but then leaned over all day on the stool - how else was I supposed to impose my superior authority on 12 year old kids?

Then of course I had to go to the grocery store and get the mail before coming home. That extra 25 minutes seemed like forever, even though I did get into a super short line with no WIC shoppers ahead of me. Ran into one of our great subs in the parking lot. Got home and instead of just changing out of my work clothes, I took a quick shower. It was Hubster's idea . . . "come home and shower away the school day." I may keep it up. First, it's a chance to wash off the rapscallions and the stress and the irritation. Secondly, it takes care of needing to shower at night or in the morning. Win-win. While in the water, I realized I should probably wear a smattering of sunscreen on my nose. I have bus-duty in the afternoons for 2 weeks.

Oh yeah, I told the kids I've been wrestling walruses to explain my bruised arms.

3h glucose tolerance

Got my results overnight and of course, since today's Sunday, I probably won't get to hear about the results until Monday at the earliest. I wish someone who's gone through this before give me some insight. I failed and passed.

Yesterday, after 10 hours of fasting, my sugars were 1mg higher than the doc wants (fail). 1h after the glucose drink, they were 197 (fail), even higher than Wednesday's failed 1 hour. After 2h, they were 97 (win) and after 3h, they were 67 (kinda win because at this point I was just about shaking).

Then I made some major rookie mistake and skipped the banana I brought for right after the test. Why? So I could EAT MORE LUNCH!!! Stupid. My eyes were so much bigger than my stomach and I almost broke down into tears when the waitress at California Pizza Kitchen brought me my peach lemonade and all I could think of was why oh why did I not get an appetizer?! oh woe! I didn't need an appetizer, but I was just that hungry. I inhaled my lemonade and needed to ask for a water (I was dehydrated too - remember it was 14hours of fasting). Then I ate half a pizza by myself and although it had cheese and steak on it, I essentially had a lot of carbohydrates. I was shaking by the time I finished my lunch. But did I stop there? Nope. I went to Sees Candy while at the mall and ate 4 chocolates on the drive home. Needless to say, I had a dump (the sugar kind not the poop kind) and was almost passed out sleeping on the way home . . . 90 minutes drive.

So obviously I'm having trouble with my sugar regulation. I was more shocked that I failed the 1h and that my overnight fasting results were so high then dropped so low. Can this be something I fix with exercise? Or am I really gonna have to change my diet as I'm obviously pre-diabetic? Don't judge me by my lunch yesterday. I was not in my right mind. The brain needs glucose to function people!!!

Failed Glucose Test

Well, on to the 3-hour glucose screen. I wasn't even expecting to have the 1-hour test when I went in for my check-up yesterday. I've had concerns about being pre-diabetic for awhile, but my GD test when preggo with Liam was super low and they've never found sugar/proteins in my urine before. But the NP thought it a good idea since my mom used to be diabetic (hasn't since she had her gastric bypass and is like 1/2 the weight she used to be) and now I'm in the overweight bmi category.

Ugh, my sugars were 189! Last time they were 93 after an hour and they're supposed to be less than 97. So it's off to the lab super early Saturday where they'll stab me every hour (has to be Saturday since school starts back next Monday and I can't take the time off at the beginning of the year like that). So much for my only day off this week before school starts back up. (I swear the lab tech must have switched my results or something . . . I'm still in shock.)

to depress or not?

When I was pregnant with Liam, I had the easiest, most emotionally stable pregnancy. You see, I've suffered from depression my entire life and finally realized what it is like to live happy like a normal person. Well, in addition to the whole pre-heating the oven thing, I've been thinking about getting back on anti-depressants again. Part of this was spurred on by my "get healthier" kick and part by Hubster's recent return to depression meds. He's been doing really well this month btw.

I took a class about depression meds and fetuses/newborns during my pregnancy. While I could pretty much teach the whole class, I did learn a lot of stuff about meds and breastfeeding. Even though I feel well educated on the topic, I still asked my doctor's opinion last week. She told me that she'd only be comfortable starting me on Zoloft (I had some success with Prozac and bad luck with Paxil). She said Prozac is probably the best one for me to e on because it is fast acting and long lasting, however it's considered a NO GO for prenant mothers. She reminded me that Zoloft is fine for fetuses but that newborns go through withdrawal shortly after birth and have been noted to have difficulty bonding. She doesn't want me using them during breastfeeding.

I thought about it a lot over the weekend. It was a difficult decision to make. I know not every pregnancy is the same and my biggest worry is what if I can't shake this malaise? what if this time I get worse during my pregnancy or suffer from post-partum? But I also know that starting the meds for just a couple weeks and then having to get off of them would be worse for me in the long run. Maybe I'll feel better or more alive when the last of my birth control hormones from my Mirena get out of my system (I have made a strong connection between my birth control & hormones and my depression worsening). I decided it would be best to just "go with it." I'm going to adopt wait-and-see how things work. I hope hope hope I'll have a happy pregnancy with the second like I did with Liam.

And of course, my doctor thought this was the best course of action considering I'm trying to get pregnant. (Doesn't that just sound like a doctor?)

adventures with yeast

...and without.

I've recently gotten into my brain to create my own sourdough. Let's ignore the fact that I also recently swore to reduce my carbohydrate intake. (tee-hee) So I've been combing the web and trying to find some recipes for making sourdough bread, but they all ask for this one important thing . . . a "starter." If you're from Northern California like I, then you understand that there ain't nothing like a San Francisco sourdough bread. In fact, there truly isn't. The SF Bay Area has its own particular kind of lactobaccillus (that's the bacteria that helps make food twang) called L. sanfranciscansis (I didn't even have to look that up. . . I saw it on a History Channel show once) that is only found in the Bay air and once you move the starter away from the Bay it picks up the local flora and loses its San Francisco taste.


Okay, bird walk about the SF dough aside, apparently it is possible to start your own starter without a "mother" or a kit. So I started yesterday morning hoping to do it right. The reason you make a sourdough starter is not only to get the twangy flavor, but to make your bread rise without keeping little yeasty beasties alive (since they're already alive and kickin' it in their "sponge" starter). It takes equal part by weight of water and flour, a clean bowl, a moderate room temperature, a loose cover, and a couple days. I started with 8 oz. tap water and 8 oz. regular ol' white flour. Here was my starter after a couple hours. It was barely bubbly and smelled like paste. Boring.

This morning I checked on it. It had gotten a little dried out and a little dark colored on the top. I decided I didn't need a whole ton of starter so I discarded half and then added another 4 oz. water and flour and stirred it all up. Then I stuck it in the oven with the light on (not the oven on) because we had so much wind drafting through the house this morning that my starter was down in the low end of the growth range (60-80 degrees F). I got the air in the oven up to 93 degrees in 2 hours with the heat from the light and from the heat from the outgassing. He was starting to smell a little like gym socks. Then I sat him on the counter. Here he is after about 36 hours total. He's pretty bubbly on the top and definitely smelling like yogurt. I wish I could say it was unpleasant, but in my reading I learned the only way to make sour dough is to get the starter sour smelling. Go figure :) And if you couldn't tell by now, we've taken to calling the startr "he" and "him". He's like another little baby right?








On a side note, here's a little loaf of french bread I made yesterday afternoon. I wish I could take all the credit for it, but I definitely let the bread machine do the kneading. I don't have the guts to try mixing or kneading by hand yet. But I seem to get the loaves to come out write. It was delish.

It's May

Today is the first of May and for some reason I'm feeling especially closer connections to my old Wiccan roots. This is of course, May Day or Beltane. It's the ancient celebration of life and creation and fertility. I don't know. I think the connection must come from the fact that I'm now officially "preheating the oven" and we are soon to be trying for another baby. I went to see my doctor yesterday and get my Mirena removed. It hurt way less than getting it inserted. In fact, I really don't think it hurt at all. Jon kept asking me if I was doing alright and I kept saying that I was fine. No cramping or tired feeling or pain. I did get my thyroid levels checked and that hurt more since it required a blood draw. (btw, got my results back and my thyroid hormone is in the normal range but it is on the low side of normal). So my doctor said that we are allowed to start trying after I have one normal cycle. Which means, I can start TTC basically at the beginning of June. YAY!!! I guess I'm feeling May because I'm really thinking about my own fertility. Hrmmm, let's see... I'm really hoping for a May baby so we better get busy by August ;)

words and noises

Liam has a new favorite word, CAR. He brings us his cars, he says car.
It's fast out-pacing Elmo.
Even cuter? His new noise, vroom-vroom.
Vrooming whenever he plays cars.